I'd really like to be able to say I could always get my family prepared for church on time and in their Sunday School classes with an attitude of worship. Some weeks this actually happens. Others, like this morning, can really try my patience. I must even admit that if I was not a Sunday School teacher, I would have probably given up this morning and try again next week!
Daniel is still teething, and it seems to be a painful event that wakes him up at night, screaming. Cris and I take turns getting up to check on him, change diapers (if needed), and massage his swollen gums with some Baby Orajel. In the meantime, Cris and I are not getting a great night's sleep.
When the alarm went off, I was definitely not ready to wake up. After dragging myself out of bed, I ran into a series of clean-ups involving baby body fluids, breakfast muffins, and small toy parts (that I happened to step on.) I managed to coax Alyssa into getting into clothes and finally making it into the shower.
As I ran a brush through my hair, I checked the clock. We should be leaving the house now. I grab the baby, hand Alyssa her Bible bag. Cris is heading back to the bedroom. I grab the diaper bag, which is suspiciously light weight. I look inside and notice the diapers are out and there are no bottles. Normally this is refilled by Cris, but he was also trying to convince Alyssa to get dressed this morning. I send Alyssa after diapers while I add formula powder to a bottle liner and measure water to be mixed later. Finally loaded up with a replenished diaper bag, I head out with the kids to the car. In the 10 feet from the garage door to the car (no, we don't park in the garage) I become drenched. Yes, I had an umbrella, which kept my kids somewhat dry. Daniel is in the car seat, and Alyssa is strapping him in. I race back inside to grab another shirt for me, my Bible bag, and the diapers that managed to slip out of the diaper bag during our trip through the garage.
I am definitely frustrated and about as far from an attitude of worship as I can get. I'm not looking forward to checking in two kids on my own after battling the torrential rain in the parking lot, and worship service- as much as I want Alyssa to behave in service and learn to worship God while I focus fully on worship, it's usually a battle with a very strong-willed daughter that requires two parents so we can relieve the other when our patience snaps.
I did cry out, and even slammed a door on my way back to the car. I wanted to give up, then. I'm the teacher for my class. Who's going to be there in this weather? God, are you really wanting me to be there today?
Cris makes it to the door, letting me know he'll join us if I wait a few minutes. We're already late. Deep breath. Cris surprised me this morning, making a last minute effort. We have this much needed rain. I'm not feeling thankful, but I do have much to be thankful for.
By the time we make the 3 minute drive to our church, I'm much calmer. This is not what Sunday mornings are supposed to be, right? I'm sorry for nearly giving up, for getting so frustrated.
Cris grabs the diaper bag and easily protects Daniel from the rain as we head inside. It's no big deal to grab Bible bags and Alyssa's hand to race across the parking lot to the entrance. Now we're back to the routine part- Cris handles Daniel's check-in and heads to his class. I make sure Alyssa settles in hers before heading to my class.
As I pass through the buildings, someone says "Good morning, how are you?" I smile- not a pasted on "I'm-pretending-to-be-okay" smile, but a real smile. I respond, "I'll be fine, just working on an attitude adjustment." He replies, "Well, this is the place to be for that! We had a morning like that, too." We both laugh as we head our separate ways. I begin to wonder if we're not the only ones who struggle on Sunday mornings after all...
By the way, God did want me there this morning. Despite the crazy weather, we had 4 visitors in my class. Two girls have come several times, now. Another very quiet girl hasn't come before, but was really needing a hug today as her dog was run over this week. The fourth visitor was a boy- from my class at school! Alyssa has actually been making progress on her behavior during worship service. Although it wasn't perfect, she had her best week so far!
And the rain. We have been praying so long for rain to end our drought. I can't believe I let myself get upset over a little soaking this morning! I'm so sorry for letting my morning drama get in the way of being thankful.
While I didn't get off to a good start, I ended worship with an attitude of gratitude. I'm so glad God isn't looking for perfection when we come before him.
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